Exhausted, irritable or frustrated?

Do you feel this way as you go for results in your daily life? When you’re feeling angry, start blaming others, or experience disappointment, you’re disconnecting from your true, best self. I know I’ve been there before and behave in a way that doesn’t end up feeling good to me or getting me the results I desire. My behavior might have been more aggressive and controlling than useful or helpful. I used to rely on that energy that has been identified as a bada$$. But, I’m not a bada$$ which I know to many means being confident. But for me, that term reminds me of older Sicilian men who are in the mafia. That is my lens. I am not that nor do I want to be that.

Interestingly, people might say I’ve acted like a bada$$ in the past. I’ve been through some tough times–divorce, dating a man who had a baby I helped to take care of, and losing my Dad within a year of his ALS diagnosis. With each difficult scenario, I could have bull-dozed my way through them. I could have project managed each one of those relationships. At some points, I probably did. I had goals in mind and wanted certain outcomes. But, when I showed up that way, it didn’t feel right nor did it get me closer to an outcome I wanted.

A New Way of Living

Over the years, I learned that those qualities of often being in “do it” and “telling” mode or of linear thinking weren’t paying off for me. I had to remember that those qualities only represented one part of me. What did work was connecting with my whole true, best self. And, my whole self includes coming from a place of love as well as strength and power. Coming from a place of love has been key to living a fulfilling and joyful life. With this reminder, I became more thoughtful about how I harnessed my energy.

I got clear about what I wanted for my life and what I wanted for the people around me although I knew I didn’t have any control over them. So, I focused on me. During my divorce, I created a mantra of expressing “dignity and grace” to get through each day. When I was dating the guy with the baby, I loved and cuddled that little guy while his mom was gone. And perhaps the most difficult time in my life, I helped my Dad transition up until his last breath. I was strong on the inside but soft on the outside as we joked around in 6 hour neurology appointments that I knew would inevitably lead to the same ending every ALS patient experienced.

I went from only letting certain aspects of myself come forth to acknowledging that I was multifaceted. I had many qualities within me that complemented each other. I had to go beyond my “get it done” attitude to engage that side of me that was playful, creative, soft, and fun-loving. These various aspects can be represented by masculine and feminine energy within ourselves. Often, to get the most out of life, we need to learn to integrate both of our masculine & feminine energy. After all, it takes strength to show vulnerability.

Integrating Masculine and Feminine Energy

As a reminder, we’re not talking about gender when it comes to masculine and feminine energy. Again, both masculine and feminine energies exist within each of us and are important to embrace. Because of past conditioning from society or our original families, we may need help in learning how to balance or integrate these energies in our lives. We may even skew heavier in one area than another. For example, if you’ve ever been called type A or controlling, you might be demonstrating too much masculine energy. Balancing your dual energies will help you feel whole, centered, and more at peace which allows you to be in a better place to experience relationships you desire and results you’d like to achieve with more joy.

What is the Difference between Masculine and Feminine Energies?

We’re talking about energies that are within us and show up when we’re interacting with others. More specifically, below are some masculine energies listed on the left and feminine energies are on the right:

• Strong & Soft
• Intentional & Creative
• Giving & Receiving
• Grounded & Playful
• Speaking & Listening
• Linear & Circuitous
• Self-disciplined & Sensitive and intuitive

Obviously, they complement each other and provide balance – again, when these energies are integrated.

How to Feel More Balanced AND Powerful?

There are so many benefits from integrating these qualities with the most outstanding being I was more balanced WHILE feeling more powerful. I slowly learned to optimize these energies by going through a process I created. Now, I’m so excited to share this process with others. So, I joined Megan Wessels and Powerful Partners to provide tips and benefits about “Embracing Your Feminine in Work and Love” via a fun Zoom call. We had a lively discussion if you want to learn more in this 27 minute video or get a taste of it in this 10 minute clip.

If you’re ready to embrace this side of yourself today, try my 21 day challenge to further integrate your feminine energy. Again, most of us leverage our masculine energy often. With this challenge, the idea is to infuse your life with more feminine energy. So, check out the Fun, Feminine Text Challenge, and you’ll receive 21 texts from me to inspire and motivate you to think a little bit differently about how you show up in your life. Or, to at least, acknowledge how you’re showing up as your great, awesome self. We could all use a little more love, right?

What People are Saying…

My clients and others who have participated in the Fun, Feminine 21 Day Challenge have experienced feeling lighter, more energized, and improved or even attracted relationships that they love. Overall, they’re feeling happier and healthier on a daily basis which is attracting more of what they desire.

This integration takes effort and practice. And, we have our own unique way of being able to integrate these qualities. Give yourself some time and space to try these qualities on so that you can see what feels good and allow them to eventually become natural or second nature. Let me know how it goes and what you learn about yourself?